By Brian
Dylan is a big kid. Sorry, I guess I have to start saying young adult. He is about 6 feet tall and has a much larger frame than I ever had. He has, however, never been interested in sports or even moving around much for that matter. His weight has fluctuated over the years based on growth spurts, eating habits, and certainly stress. With our move to the apartments, we now have a very nice gym with free weights, machines, elliptical, bikes, and treadmills.
Dylan and I decided we would start working out. Or rather I decided that this would be the perfect time to start working out and Dylan reluctantly agreed to join me. I set up a basic regimen of simple upper and lower body exercises and we proceeded to get into a routine of Monday, Wednesday, Friday for about 30 minutes each morning.
I use this time to help him practice skills like “working in” with others between sets, wiping equipment down after using, and avoiding “decapitation” from the rope jumpers scattered throughout the room. When I ask him what exercise he likes the most, I typically get “not pushups” for his answer. Ironically, we have found that our children are crystal clear on what they do not like to do, but find it difficult to communicate what they do like. One exception I have found is that Dylan will tell me that he really likes finishing his workout with 12 minutes on the elliptical. Evidently 12 minutes is perfect, not 10 and certainly we better not ever consider increasing it to 15 minutes because that would be crazy!
Although I still get only a lukewarm response to my text asking him “Are you still up for a 7AM workout?”; he now rarely complains. It is undeniable that Dylan has benefited from working out. You can tell the difference in his posture and strength that he has built over the past several months. He is now relatively lean and his confidence is also increasing as a result. This also gives us father/son time, and he often indicates he feels good after the workouts. Routines are good for our kids and this one seems to be adding positivity to both Dylan’s and my life.
Post Script – Importance of being on time
Most of us have heard the old adage, “if you are not early then you are late”. That is generally how Bobbie and I have operated throughout most of our relationship. In fact, we hate being late for anything and we usually show up places with some time to kill.
When we are heading out as a family, we text Dylan and he immediately replies. Then we text Jolee, who usually does not reply and requires a call if we want a response. Truth be told, Jolee typically replies the following day “in bulk” to the majority of our texts. There are many occasions when we wait with the car outside their apartment and Jolee comes out in pajama pants, a shirt that absolutely does not match, and “bed head”. She immediately gets the finger point and a quick comment to change her clothes and standard reference for her to perform the big 3 – “teeth, deodorize, and hair”. These steps take time which is why we try to text and call ahead. Lately, it seems that our kids take turns being the last one out, forgetting their phone or simply not being fit for public appearance.
Our new rule is that they should take the time that we tell them we will be leaving and subtract 5 minutes. This is the time they need to get ready and then leave their apartment before the time required so you actually arrive on time – or even better a few minutes early. This rule is still a work- in- progress, but it is going a lot better.
Truthfully, I am not batting 1,000 regarding being on time for workouts. With my work schedule, we occasionally move our morning workouts to the afternoon. There was one particularly cold day when I got caught on a work call and did not meet Dylan outside at the appointed time. He attempted several times to reach me via text with no response and he was smart enough to contact Bobbie and discuss what had happened. I didn’t feel like a great Father after that one. Guess I need to practice what I preach.
Since this post is going out on Valentine’s Day, We have included a few of Jolee’s valentine creations for this year.
